Office Romances - What’s Your View?
- 35 Comment
It’s time now to reveal secrets! Have you ever been involved in an office romance? With the news recently about David Letterman’s “indiscretions” with staff, the topic of office romances has been gaining some coverage. Some experts are claiming that millions every year enter into at least one romance starting from work.
Personally, I see nothing wrong in being involved with someone from work – but there are certain conditions that should be met. For example, if you’re married, then you shouldn’t be messing around with a co-worker! I also don’t think it’s advisable for someone in a management position being involved with a staff member because this can lead to obvious problems if things don’t work out. Finally, if you’re going to become romantically involved with a co-worker, you should leave the “romancing” outside of work.
Over the years, I’ve been involved in three office romances, one of which resulted in marriage. At the present time, in our workplace, I’m aware of at least four romances going on. Two of them involve married men who are cheating on their wives.
But what about flirting? Let’s face it, you spend a great deal of time with co-workers. Is there anything wrong with a little harmless flirting? Is there such a thing as “harmless flirting?” There’s always the chance, I suppose, that someone may take it more seriously. I recently had a young staff member say to me “If you were only 20 years younger…” to which I replied, “if I was 20 years younger I’d still be old enough to be your father!” Oh, to be young again! Well, at least you can’t be arrested for what you’re thinking!!
that’s the way I see it
35 Comments on this post
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Windroot said:
Office romances are a fact of life but almost always a bad idea. As a realist, I would say that if you are a supervisor, no way no how under any circumstance. Non-supervisors in a peer-to-peer relationship, well stuff happens. Just remember, you may not always be peers. That's when it gets ugly.
October 14th, 2009 at 11:25 pm -
Aria'z Ink said:
Been there, done that, got the jacket. It tends to not end well though.
October 15th, 2009 at 12:22 am -
TracyC said:
Whenever I'm orienting new employees I encourage them to find prospective dates elsewhere; typically it causes problems at work and who needs the drama.
October 15th, 2009 at 12:46 am -
Rose bestflash sites said:
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Jan @ BetterSpines said:
Definitely a no-no between management and staff. Big Mistake! Co-workers, why not, as long as they are both single preferably. Trouble is, most people spend more time with their colleagues than their spouses. And often have more in common. That's just the way it seems to be in many cases.
October 15th, 2009 at 5:37 am -
BK@Symphonyoflove said:
I had been through one and I called it off at that time. The lady was married and it just didn't seem right to do it. After calling it off, I resigned from my work there too.
October 15th, 2009 at 1:12 pm -
Theresa said:
I agree with all your conditions of office romance. I've never been in one seeing as I've been married nearly 21 years and so the only jobs before that were in fast food or retail. Saying that I'm not adverse to it happening, just think the people involved have to remember that at the end of the day work is work and should act accordingly. Flirting is definitely something that can end up being misinterpreted and cause a lot of headaches. I have had issues at jobs where men "thought" I was flirting (which I was not) and thought this was their invitation for more. Not a pleasant situation.
October 15th, 2009 at 4:38 pm -
Liezl said:
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October 16th, 2009 at 2:19 am -
Buggys said:
Agreed on the management/staff issue. I think romance in the office between co-workers is inevitable. We generally spend more (waking) time with our co-workers than with our family or friends. Those people do become another family of sorts. Ok, not that you should date a family member but….I digress. I met my husband on the job and after 3 years of romancing we have now been married for 15 years.
October 16th, 2009 at 2:35 pm -
Joanne Olivieri said:
Office romances nine times out of ten never end well. However, even so I don't think it's anyone's business. In the case Letterman my opinion is who cares. It's his own personal life and should be treated as such.
October 16th, 2009 at 5:18 pm -
VetTech said:
Realistically with people spending longer hours at their offices, they don't spend enough time out of them to meet other people..so naturally, many relationships (not only extra-marital ones) begin in the workplace. But if it's serious one half of the couple should seek work elsewhere.
October 16th, 2009 at 6:22 pm -
Spicybugz said:
What ever happened to work being WORK ? Are people paid to flirt and find romance at work? If they have enough time to play and flirt at work, then either, they aren't being given enough work to do, or they are slacking off on the job. I think it's a bad idea and I have seen too many marriages ruined over this exact thing.
October 18th, 2009 at 5:28 am -
sunshine said:
this is a great post. a few years back, when i was still working at an office, i got involved with a co-worker. we tried to be discreet because inter-office romances were being frowned upon at our place of work. but it was hard because we worked in the same department and some nosey staff from our department started spreading stuff about us. i don't know why they did it - it wasn't as if we were ignoring our tasks. as it was, we inspired each other to work harder. so it was annoying. eventually, we decided to just part ways because the whole situation was starting to get out of hand.
October 18th, 2009 at 6:26 am -
buckrobin said:
You`re right about “not always be peers“ and that`s one of the reasons why getting involved with a co-worker can turn sour.
October 18th, 2009 at 9:59 am -
buckrobin said:
There`s always the problem that in the event of a break-up you still have to see the other person at work!
October 18th, 2009 at 10:00 am -
buckrobin said:
We also try and discourage co-workers from dating but it is not company policy since this would be hard to enforce.
October 18th, 2009 at 10:03 am -
buckrobin said:
Office romances are bound to happen for that very reason - more time is spent with colleagues. Where I work management do not socialize with staff outside working hours except at special events such as Christmas parties - but with a few drinks this can sometimes create problems!
October 18th, 2009 at 10:06 am -
buckrobin said:
I think married men are more likely to have office affairs than married women. The fact that you became involved with a married woman is a rarer situation.
October 18th, 2009 at 10:09 am -
buckrobin said:
Some people are more open and friendly than others and for this reason have problems when someone takes their `flirting`as more than just that. It`s been more than 30 years since I was last involved in an office romance. I had just gotten divorced and was looking to get involved with someone. It turned out to be a mistake!
October 18th, 2009 at 10:18 am -
buckrobin said:
As I mentioned in the original post, one of my `romances`ended up in marriage and although we eventually divorced, I had no regrets. My ex and I became very good friends - we just couldn`t live together! I was working for the British Government at the time here in Canada and once we got married it was policy that one of us had to quit at the High Commission. My wife went on to work for the Canadian government.
October 18th, 2009 at 10:22 am -
buckrobin said:
I think the Letterman thing has been blown way out of proportion and was just another example of the media having nothing better to report on. But, the public loves `gossip`and so celebrity affairs grab the headlines!
October 18th, 2009 at 10:24 am -
buckrobin said:
You`re absolutely right - a lot of people don`t have friends who aren`t co-workers because they aren`t involved in other things outside the office. I rarely socialize with co-workers because I prefer to have a life outside of work.
October 18th, 2009 at 10:27 am -
buckrobin said:
Being with the same people day after day for hours is what causes a situation to go beyond being work related. A lot of people that end up in affairs or romances are those who don`t have outside interests to keep them occupied. When the only people they see are co-workers it`s bound to happen. As I mentioned in another reply, I rarely socialize with co-workers because I have other outside interests and friends.
October 18th, 2009 at 10:31 am -
buckrobin said:
One of the problems with office romances is that they cause the inevitable office gossip!
October 18th, 2009 at 10:32 am -
FHnet said:
this post are nice.. office romance that i would do now
October 18th, 2009 at 12:54 pm -
sunshine said:
exactly! worst, the gossips weren't even true. at least the guy and i have remained friends and when we do get to talk, we just laugh about the whole thing.
October 19th, 2009 at 12:00 pm -
Jessica said:
I don't really mind the thought of an office romance. There are a bunch of pros and cons with each of them. My biggest worry would be my thoughts on how awkward it would get if the relationship didn't work.
October 20th, 2009 at 12:10 am -
lei said:
I've come close and it really is a bad idea.
October 20th, 2009 at 11:24 am -
The Hawg! said:
I see no problem at all with the time-honored office romance.
However, the simple fact is nobody minds their own business anymore, meaning office romances result in rumors flying all over the place.
The rumors are about the only downside, really…
October 20th, 2009 at 1:42 pm -
Mom said:
I met my husband at work. We were 'set up' by a co-worker.
We've been together for nearly 12 years now and married for 6. We have 2 very beautiful little girls together. I wouldn't trade him for anybody or anything in the world.
October 21st, 2009 at 2:57 pm -
HeartsMakeFamilies said:
I guess I'm kinda lucky. Only person I can flirt with is a 4 year old little boy lol.
October 23rd, 2009 at 4:46 am -
Julie said:
Hi. I guess people get close in the office more than in any other place in the planet. This is where mature individuals meet and have the chance to share intellectual views and opinions. From there you develop likeness towards each other. It would be ok if one’s work will not be jeopardized and their main focus will still be their jobs.
October 25th, 2009 at 7:40 am -
roni said:
mines did not end well.. flirting is okay as long as it's just that.. and nothing more
October 26th, 2009 at 3:08 am -
ciciam2009 said:
i have also experience in romance in office, but it is sad that we are break right now. but it is okay
November 4th, 2009 at 2:07 pm -
bestflash sites said:
It is a modern time of young generation.So it is not matter that romance in office.So do'nt worry keep it up….
November 16th, 2009 at 6:41 am
